“Nip/Tuck” (Season 5 Finale/Episode 13) Recap!

Fame is seemingly a bad thing in our day and age. The public initially brings up a celebrity, only to be spiteful when they become successful. And that’s when the public slowly takes them down back into obscurity only to repeat the process again with someone else. 

The evil price of fame was one of the main issues present in last night’s Season 5 Finale of “Nip/Tuck”. A favorite guilty pleasure soap opera of mine, the 5th season of “Nip/Tuck” fulfilled on every level this season with humor, shock value, and plot twists that worked very well for me overall.

Last night it was as if the show was on speed. There were plot twists, ugly sights to be seen, and revelations that shocked me right up to that messed up final scene.

The episode mainly dealt with whacko Colleen and her attempts to get back into Sean’s life. She stormed his office looking for help with her suicide scars. She is really crazy, and I am glad that the writers slipped in Liz’ line about Colleen violating a restraining order. It shows that while we may think Sean said nothing to no one after her suicide attempt at his house, we thought wrong as everyone was aware of it. I liked how Christian called her a “Freak” after they all forcefully threw her out of the office. Isn’t “Freak” the best insult you can hurl at someone who disgusts you? I know I like using the word.

The fall out from Matt’s incest with his sister was addressed. The girls mother came back to meet Christian. She was a stunner in her day, but Diabetes took her legs, so she was now wheelchair bound. Christian being the supreme man whore that he is didn’t even recognize her.

The mother came back with knowledge of her daughter’s sexual affair with her brother Matt. She had every intention of stopping them from continuing on. Knowing that Matt would doubt his sister’s paternity (due to his father’s hyper-sexual lifestyle) they got the blood tested and confirmed that Christian was indeed her father. This fact weirded out Matt very much and he tried to stop seeing her. But you could tell in his demented mind he still wanted to be with her.

I have ALWAYS hated Matt’s character. Since season 1 he has been diabolically stupid. I loved how Christian even asked him if he was mentally ill last night. He had every right to ask since Matt has made the worst choices a person could make in the history of life yet he still manages to come from them unscathed. I just want his character to be written off completely.  I have no sympathy for him, and I just think that he is a trouble magnet that needs to go away.

Also, was anyone disturbed a bit by the scene of Christian bedding the amputee? I genuinely thought when they were both knocking back shots of Patron Silver that they were having fun as friends. But here comes Christian and his raving sexual addiction to ruin my eyes for the evening.

The way the sex scene was filmed was for pure shock value. It could have been done in a more tasteful way, but all it did was make me look at the TV with that crazy face we all make. You know, the “they really took it there” face? Ryan Murphy seems insistant on shocking us all this year, and it’s working.

It was also good to see another “Popular” cast member on the show with Lisa Darr’s guest spot as Christian’s amputee baby mama. So how many “Popular” cast members have been on “Nip/Tuck” so far? Leslie Bibb was the Carver’s 1st victim. Bryce Johnson was a DL/Bisexual military guy who sexed up (no penis having) Quentin Costa. And Leslie Grossman is currently playing Sean’s publicist Bliss. So who is the next cast member from “Popular” to make an appearance? Can we please have”Nicole Julian” on soon? Thank you…

Now the big question we were all waiting for since last week was answered. What was Julia’s fate after her gunshot to the head?

Like I said last week, in TV Land when you are shot off screen you don’t die. And it was no shock to me that Julia was alive, albeit in a coma. Being that the true nature of “Nip/Tuck” is that it’s a Soap Opera on crack, I didn’t consider the pretty contrived coma plot twist annoying. Eden claimed that Julia shot herself in a fit of depression and everyone believed her. Except Sean of course.

Sean showed his true colors last night as he displayed that he was never over his marriage with Julia like we all thought. He was genuinely upset at what happened, and you can tell he blamed himself for not being there for her. But I must say Eden is a pro. I was thinking last week, why would Ryan Murphy do something that could potentially write off one of the shows best villains since Ava? How could Eden continue on the show if she shot Julia? Once Julia wakes up from her coma, she would be able to tell the truth about what happened.

And what happened? Julia woke up!

When Eden heard the news from her mother Olivia, she decided to fess up to her mother (off screen of course). But before she did, she put on the “Mommy I’m in trouble” face and immediately Olivia was sucked in. This just proves that when anyone is in a jam, blood is thicker than water. But we as an audience don’t know what was said since their conversation happened off screen. So again, you know what happens when something is off screen? There is more to this confession.

The news of Julia awakening from her coma reached all her family. But in a plot twist so contrived (even for “Nip/Tuck”), Julia awoke with AN EXPLOSIVE CASE OF AMNESIA! (again, I’m still missing “Futurama”).

I have gone on record on my site as to how much I despise the amnesia plot device, I think it’s lazy writing. But I knew they were going to try and find a way to let Eden stick around, and this is it. With Julia unable to recall her family and friends and the accident it leaves Eden free to be evil and sexy.

Also, was anyone else curious about Olivia’s bedside behavior with Julia. She seems so concerned, but remember her off screen conversation with her daughter Eden. There is much more going on here and I am anxious to see how it all plays out. But then I remember that it’s the season finale, so I have to wait for Season 6 to see how it wraps up.  

Going back to Sean showing that he still loved Julia, what was with him lying to her and saying that they were happily married? That was really odd. But they did look happy, even though it could have been the drugs that made Julia look happy. I personally hope that Julia never remembers how much of an annoying character she was. It would be great if she starts acting like “Samantha Who?” and corrects her miserable attitude. I also really can’t stand to see the back and forth love triangle between her, Sean and Christian anymore. I just want her to be happy for once and not yelling and shaking like she always does.

The surgery B plot was pretty funny, but that is only because Jennifer Coolidge can make reading the phone book look funny. Otherwise, it was OK, but it ultimately ate up time in the finale for all of the good story lines we wanted to see resolved.

Which brings me back to psycho Colleen and her descent into obsessive madness. After throwing her out of the practice, she showed up on set of “Hearts and Scalpels” to torment Sean yet again. Overall I enjoyed how Colleen came back into the picture in this episode. All though I really had to suspend my disbelief a bit as how she was able to violate a restraining order 2 times without being locked up. She is obviously demented but continued to get away with things. Evil of me to say, but I bet Sean wishes he would have left her to bleed to death before he called 911. No amount of help or therapy or medication would have helped Colleen change.

The CAA Agent that was turned to a human teddy bear subplot came back in a shocking and quick scene where he unexpectedly fell out of Sean’s closet. The lingering shot on his decomposed face after the commercial break was creepy. But the next scene where Christian just sat there eating Yoplait and looking at the body was just one of the reasons why I love the show. It can be deadly serious one moment, and the next it’s just funny. After this incident, the police started to finally do their jobs and look for Colleen who apparently has gone south of the border. But come on, with 10 minutes remaining in a season finale, we all knew a Bomb Drop was waiting to happen.

The fall out from Sean’s stalker, and an agent being found dead in his house was fuel for the paparazzi’s fire. They relentlessly followed his car as he drove to visit Julia in the hospital. BTW, what an ugly car it was. I expect a nicer quality car from a top plastic surgeon. But that’s besides the point.

At the hospital Christian decided to take a depressed Annie away from her amnesiac mother to go get a burger and fries from Johnny Rockets. (Man how I miss their burgers, damn you Atkins Diet). They left Sean behind with Julia.

On their way to lunch, the car was swarmed by the vicious Paps who were only interested in taking pictures of a distressed Annie in the passenger seat. As Christian drove away in a rush they were suddenly t-boned by another car. This would have been a shocking scene if FX didn’t already give it away in the promos for the episode. From the way the accident looked, I thought Annie was a gonner since the car hit her side pretty hard. Luckily she survived the incident and Sean was in the office to perform an emergency surgery on his daughter to repair the damage to her face.

The rest of the episode went down like this:

Colleen is batshit crazy, and I knew the moment that Sean asked to be alone in the surgery room was trouble. Also, blood coming out of someone’s mouth on TV or Film is usually a bad thing. So I am unsure is Sean will survive the repeated stabs to the back at the hands of Colleen.

I understand he is a main character, but it’s not like main characters haven’t unexpectedly kicked the bucket on TV shows. Remember when Nate on “Six Feet Under” died 3 episodes before the series finale?

To me, Sean’s fate is uncertain at this point. .

Questions For Season 6:

  • What was with Christian’s face when he found out Sean quit “Hearts and Scalpels”? It looked like he was happy and had plans to swoop in and take his role.
  • Will Annie be OK now that she’s alone on the operating table with a dying father on the floor?
  • Will Colleen do the unthinkable and kidnap Annie?
  • Was Liz stabbed as well? Is she OK?  
  • How long will Eden be off the hook for shooting Julia?
  • Will Julia remember she detoured into Lesbianville this season with Olivia?
  • Will the character Matt just die already?
  • What are Kimber and Ram up to? And is Eden still involved with them?
  • Aidan Stone has been in rehab for a really long time hasn’t he?

What did you guys think of the finale? I for one enjoyed it. I am anxiously awaiting September’s Season 6 premiere. I am curious to see if the next batch of 8 episodes (that were initially scheduled for this season) either wrap up this storyline, or wrap up the series. I know “Nip/Tuck” is still a ratings winner for FX. But after 5 seasons of incredible shocks, and 2 seasons of redeeming itself for the ridiculous Season 3, will Ryan Murphy decide to end the show while it’s back on top?

And as for Sean’s fate, after remembering the below happening to Christian and him coming out of it alive, I have some hope:

Then again, the actually stabbing happened where? Off screen…. 

Well folks it’s been fun recapping the show on my site. Thanks for visiting www.youarenotthefather.net. I appreciate you all taking the time out to read what I have to say.

Until September 2008!


UPDATE 2/24/2008My review of the show “Nip/Tuck” was recently accused of being insensitive towards people with disabilities. I don’t really respond to many critics of my blog, but this time I had to in order to articulate my point of view correctly.

I just want to clarify something. I did not say that people with disabilities cannot be viewed in a sexually desirable way. I personally believe that everyone is beautiful. Many of our brothers and sisters experience accidents and tragedies daily that take away their ability to walk on their own. But that doesn’t make them less beautiful.

I wouldn’t condone making fun of ANY type of disability. I’m not that type of person. Also I don’t know what life has in store for myself, family, and even future children. Life is an unexpected and mysterious thing, and the heartless idiots who make fun of these situations don’t realize they could end up in a similar situation.

My reference in my review was due to the fact that this season “Nip/Tuck” has just been going for shocks. And while any good Soap Opera junkie can appreciate shocks, I feel like this one was a little tasteless. The scene in question could have been done in a more tasteful manner since the character was extremely likeable and deserving of a little more class.

My reference to “ruining my eyes” was a joke in reference to how Julian McMahon is not in the same shape he once was, yet he continues to show get naked frequently on the show to bed anyone he can.

But the camera work merely focused on her legs just to make us all get shocked. And I am not going to lie, it shocked me because it’s something I have never seen on Prime Time TV. But I just wished that they treated that scene a little more differently. It was done in a “Yup folks, Christian is a dog, he will bed anyone” fashion. And that shouldn’t have been the case since he previously took her virginity, she is the mother of his child, and she claimed her daughter was her “Scarlet Letter” in an episode prior. He should have treated her with more respect.

And that was my main issue with the scene. (And the digital erasing of the legs was done poorly as well).

I apologize for being too wordy, but I want to make sure you all know where I am coming from.

Thank you for reading my review BTW. I never anticipated that it would have caught on so much. In the future I will try to articulate my feelings better so that confusion like this wont happen again.

Thanks and God Bless!




  1. The show has been pretty awesome this year. I hope it doesn’t end but I think 6 is a nice even number to end it on.

  2. “soap opera on crack” pretty much sums it up. i stopped watching last year because it was all becoming too ridiculous for me to handle. you really do have to wonder where they come up with this stuff!!

  3. Maybe the whole moving to LA will be a bad dream? That would make Sean live and Julia not shot? Also crazy Gina could come back, her funeral was so weird it definately backs up my dream theory. I think they are still in FL. and the entire season 5 is all just a nightmare !

  4. While I wouldn’t rule out anything in “Nip/Tuck” land, the idea of a “Dream Season” would ruin the show for good.

    The “Dream Season” concept did not work well for “Dynasty” and as a result, the show started to make it’s decent down the ratings. Audiences generally do not like being tricked. And also, Season 5 would be one hell of an elaborate dream for someone to conjure up. I couldn’t imagine Sean waking up to find Julia happily showering as if nothing happened ala Pam and Bobby.

    Either way, I have a sense that “Nip/Tuck” is ramping up for a series finale this September.

    Ryan Murphy always said the core of this show was about a deep relationship between 2 men who were not lovers. I think that both Christian and Sean have experienced a whole lot together and it’s probably high time they either rode off into the Hollywood sunset, or something dramatic happens that will definitely end their story.

  5. If Sean is killed off then the audience has already been tricked. Remember the future episode with Connor? Sean was still very well alive.

  6. If Sean really does die, the show goes. It seemed that with everyone’s quirks and weirdness, he was the anchor that reacted how and said what the audience was thinking. Without Sean, the show has no “stable” (how stable can you be on Nip/Tuck?) character anymore and it becomes one big crapstorm of whacked out characters (well, Liz was pretty stable but she’s not lead role worthy).

    They should have just rode the wave of emotion and interest that these past few episodes have sparked and played out the remainder of the season.

  7. Ok just watched the season 5 finale…. There is no way that sean is dead. Just think back to one episode called Connor Macnamara in season 4. So we obviously know sean lives. As for Nip tuck’s future, the last i heard was that they wanted to do a total of 7 seasons.

  8. I pretty much agree with all that you said, the gay ass car, matt and the very end was very crazy. I actually jumped out of my seat!

  9. I think Sean will make it out of this alive, but unfortunately, I think Liz will not have survived. I think they are headed for a series Finale in this next season.

  10. I think the dream concept could be an idea….however not the entire season. Possibly the whole crazy psycho stabbing Sean (I was so upset I almost cried lol) was a dream but this season has ben so all over the place its hard to tell. Hopefully after its all said and done Colleen will go put Matt and Olivia out of their personal misery and Sean will live!!! Now theres a great story line for ya.

  11. I agree that Season 5 has been completely unbelievable. There is just no way all those things could happen to a small group of people in a life time. But, it’s TV, and I get sucked into the plot line as if it were all normal life. I actually like Matt a lot, even though he seems to have the worst judgement of anyone on planet earth. Sean’s not dead – there’s no show without Sean. No way, no how. I also agree with the author that the whole amnesia thing is lazy writing, and I wish they’d get rid of Eden already. She makes my skin crawl, and not in a guilty pleasure sort of way. I wonder what Olivia said to Julia when she first woke up, since she obviously had alone time with her. Wouldn’t she have explained that she was her lesbian lover?Obviously she didn’t since Sean was able to convince her they were still married. One question I have….. what the hell happened to Connor? And where was Annie before this episode? I’m pretty sure I didn’t miss any episodes. They just dropped off the face of the planet. Can anyone answer this for me? Oh and the Prius? Awesome touch, but an unlikely choice for Christian, especially the ugly color. The engine made a start-up sound when they drove off to the hospital, which Priuses do not make.

  12. Thank you so much for your wonderfully detailed review. We were away on holiday for the UK finale, and our recorder suffered a power cut, meaning we had missed the show and the only other repeat. Thanks to you I now know all that happened in the finale and my frustration can end. Keep up the good work! PP&DJ

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