Spoiler: Does Tailor Made Win “I Love New York 2”?

Tailor Made 

According to “Miss Jones in the Morning” on Hot 97, Tailor Made wins “I Love New York 2”.

Apparently Miss Jones morning show has correctly spoiled the winner of VH1 shows in the past, hence the reason VH1 stopped sending their contestants over to the show for interviews.

If the spoiler is in fact true and Tailor Made wins, I would be happy with the outcome. He is the only source of humor on “I Love New York 2” aside from the muppet herself.

On a side note Sister Patterson has oddly been a bit more subdued this season. She was hilarious last season, but this season she has been quieter. Did New York get pissed at the fact that Sister Patterson stole the show last year with her “Praise Him!” song in church?

By far the best thing this season that Sister P. has done was her reaction to seeing Midget Mac for the 1st time. She got out the limo and screamed as if she got scared. That was a moment I saw over and over thanks to my DVR.

Anyhow, good for Tailor Made if he wins. I think the dude is so ridiculous that he is funny. The other guys hate his guts, but I think they take the competition WAY too seriously.

I mean, look at the end prize. A chain smoking, plastic surgery enhanced, crooked weave wearing, Ranch Dressing loving, stereotypical caricature of a woman who in the past let Flavor Flav sex her up.

Seriously, I think Punk, Buddha, The Entertainer and Mr. Wise need to remember what I just said the next time they get all emotional on the show.

This is what you got to look at EVERY DAY if you win:

Crazy Eyes 

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The Casting Breakdown for the “Friday The 13th” Remake makes me angry!

Jason Reloaded Jason Reloaded

The prospect of a “Friday The 13th” remake really excited me when I originally heard the news that Michael Bay and Platinum Dunes were going to be in charge of it. After all Platinum Dunes successfully brought back Leatherface to popularity with their 2003 remake of the “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” (My Review). 

Another thing I was happy to ignore is the fact that “Friday The 13th” has been remade 9 times already. Each film after part 1 was essentially a reboot of the series. But hey, Jason was finally coming back in a solo film so I didn’t care. Jason Voorhees is one of my favorite movie villains. I also liked the news that Marcus Nispel got the directing job for the remake. Marcus directed the TCM remake, and he has the ability to make a small budget movie look expensive. 

So what is my problem? 

My problem is the stupid ass casting breakdown that went out this week. The character descriptions prove that this will be another stupid ass horror movie that goes for camp and laughs instead of scares like “Freddy vs Jason”. I am now officially over this project.

Here are some gems from the cast breakdown: 

LAWRENCE: Black, early to mid-20s. Good-looking and funny as hell. He’s smart and is already trying to get his own company started. He puts on a white sounding “good ol’ boy” voice when talking to his business associates. 

Now explain to me what this backstory has anything to do with Jason killing kids in the forest? Seriously, that description is on some dumb and borderline offensive shit. “White sounding”? So what the fuck does that mean? That white people sound a certain way? I don’t know about you, but even with my Puerto Rican heritage, English is my first language. Improper use of the English language during inappropriate times annoys the hell out of me. Adding to this, one of my best friends is white, and when we are hanging out he uses all of the slang words and phrases that I use. 

But wait, there is more! 

WHITNEY: Caucasian. Mid 20s. Younger sister to Clay. Pretty and strong girl. She has the smarts and the will to survive in the most desperate of circumstances. 

CLAY: Caucasian. Late 20s. Older brother of Whitney. He’s good-looking and has a quiet inner confidence. He’s a dedicated and smart guy. All the girls definitely find him attractive.  

CHUMBLER: Caucasian, early to mid-20s. A little chubby, but he wears his size well, along with his cool chin beard. He has a tendency to make wear his attraction to attractive girls on his sleeve. He has no shame. Please submit your funniest character actors.
 

What the fuck kind of name is “Chumbler”?  

One of my problems with casting breakdowns like this is the fact that all of these characters sound so different from one another that you wonder why they are even friends. I don’t know about you, but my friends all act similar to me and share a similar sense of humor, you never wonder how or why I am friends with someone I hang out with. But when you read this casting breakdown you can’t help but ask yourself a big “Why the fuck are they even friends?” 

Despite this breakdown, I really hope that this movie is taken seriously. Camp and self referential gags worked in 1997 with “Scream”. It’s not going to work again 10 years later. Especially when the “SAW” films inexplicably got other horror movies on lockdown.  

Platinum Dunes needs to realize that “SAW” is their main competition. Especially when “SAW IV” had the power to make “Rob Zombie’s Halloween” come out in August, and “The Mist” come out in November.  

Let’s not forget how “SAW 3” also shitted on the chances of “Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning” making any money last October. So if I were Platinum Dunes, I’d be looking for some payback.  

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“Make It Work!”: Project Runway Returns…

PR4 

Project Runway is one of those “Reality Competition” shows that catch you off guard. It’s almost like “America’s Next Top Model” with it’s appeal. The two shows have concepts that normally don’t appeal to my viewing tastes. But it’s all about the execution that make both shows watchable.

“Project Runway” has the edge though because skill and talent is what gets you to the top. And as much as Tyra Banks would like to try and make us believe otherwise, modeling is NOT hard. Designing and making a dress in 1 day is.

Last night “Project Runway” returned for it’s 4th season after nearly a year’s absence from the airwaves. And the winning formula that made the show a sleeper success is still the same. I also like how the new group of designers is seemingly more talented than the last batch. 

One other change I noticed? With the very good designers showcased last night, I didn’t see any huge crazy egos. Wow.  

Here are some of last night’s best designs:

Winner 

The above dress won last nights challenge. The designer Rami seems to be the dude to beat. He is laid back, has no ego and has already designed a dress for Jessica Alba. Sure the dress is simple looking, but the dude sure has a flair for making things look expensive.

Good Effort

The above would have been my choice for runner up of the night. It was designed by Steven. I give the dude props for making a suit jacket in 1 day. Maybe I am easy to please? Whatever, that shit looks like it would be hard to pull off. So he gets major props from me.

Good Effort 2

Another choice for last night’s top 3 would be this design from Jack. My decision is solely based on the strength that he designed something that looks like it could be sold in a store right now. It’s well constructed, well designed, and Jack also seems like a cool guy who didn’t give off any crazy ego. He is also one of the few designers last night who actually listened to Tim Gunn and made use of the Bluefly.com accessory wall.

Unfairly Bashed 

This design by Ricky gets my “Unfairly Bashed” award of the night. Sure it’s not crazy, or extravagant, but there is something to be said about a well constructed design. He put this together quickly, and the end result looked expensive. Hopefully he will be able to think bigger next time, but I feel that he was in the bottom 3 last night for no reason. There were some ugly designs that got a free pass last night.

As with any reality show, the first few episodes serve to eliminate all the pretenders. So you never know how good anyone can really be until the few that are left are all equally skilled. That’s when you start seeing the contestants try and one up each other with their designs. And I for one am anxious to see if this season can live up to the long wait and hype.

“Project Runway 4” airs Wednesday Night’s @ 10PM on Bravo